Monday, May 05, 2008

Solitude

Over the few months, I have enjoyed a great deal of solitude in my daily life. This is never something that I have been comfortable with as being alone for any length of time causes anxiety within me. As I sit on the train during my long commute home, I feel trapped within the confines of my own thoughts...not good for someone who dissects every aspect of their existence.

Being in recovery has taught me that being alone is not an emotional jail sentence. I have gotten to know myself pretty well over the last few years and spending time alone is a lot more content without the drama going on inside my head. And spending time with oneself is essential, particularly in recovery. It means making time to nurture and love yourself. This weekend, I painted. I planted tomatoes. I cooked breakfast for myself and read the paper. I wrote a long entry in my journal. And while I had a bit of socializing, I was mainly solo for the entire weekend. And it was blissful.

These are all little things we tend to forget about in the craziness of daily life. Take time for yourself. Five minutes or five hours, it's making a concerted effort to do one thing that involves only you. And it works wonders.

3 comments:

Grace said...

I'm glad you posted this. I had not really thought about enjoying solitude, my weekends were normally spent drinking if alone. This weekend I had had a pleasant time on my own but it felt strange. I have just realised the strangeness was due to not feeling hungover and guilty but just feeling relaxed and normal. No drama! Bliss!

Misery Marketing said...

Sometimes I think it would do me good to be put in a straight jacket and a rubber room just so I could be forced to do nothing and be alone. It might be a scary journey to be forced to be alone in my head but it may also be a portal to the secrets of the universe.

deepak said...

i was addicted for 14 years and now i am sober and commenting on the blogs of addiction and i have a blog too .

http://de-adiction.blogspot.com