Looking within to find your own truth: A Process

Something I wrote to help assign a process to self awareness in recovery:

After you have made the commitment to recover, you begin the process. The groups, the meetings, the goals that are the core staple of any recovery program. From whatever you are recovering from in life. All this becomes slowly melds into your existence. You see differently. Your immediate need to recover subsides and the need to recover fully begins to externalize. You have begun your travels. And we begin the process of finding what is within ourselves.

When we are searching for the truth within ourselves, we are becoming self aware. This is the biggest door to unlock in recovery. It is the heaviest door and the one with the most complex locks. It can be agonizing at times to become more self aware, as we are learning to peel away the layers to our very core. However, the more self aware we become, the more balanced our core becomes. And this enables us to live and love successfully.

In finding this truth, we can categorize self awareness into five elements:

Emotional— the artistic element. When we learn to recognize our emotions and the potential and place for each, we begin to express ourselves. We may write or speak to a significant other with more clarity and purpose. We learn that emotions hold one of the largest keys to unlocking the doors within us.

Physical— Being aware of our physical presence helps to make the internal a tangible embodiment. When we strengthen ourselves physically, we are also strengthening our internal core. This physical core enables us to maintain strength when we are emotionally weak. And I have found that the stronger my core is physically, the more balanced I feel overall.

Intellectual— This is where we separate emotion and intellect. It is the parent in the parent/child equation. The strong. The rational. When we begin to listen to our intellectual side, we learn how to balance our emotions with rationality. We process those events and situations with our brain. And we are able to let go more easily.

Spiritual— And in this, we begin to find our inner serenity. Peace becomes evident within and we become aware of that safe haven we have worked so hard to create. You may look to a higher being. Or you may have a very secular spiritual guide. Through all our layers, we have beliefs that are strong and passionate.

Social—Self awareness carries. It becomes an aura around you. The energy you have found within yourself begins to exude into everyday situations. It glows. It enables you to interact with society. With friends and lovers and acquaintances.


During this process of self discovery, I found that there were a great number of things I needed to balance. I was putting too much of myself into the emotional element. I had no way of distinguishing between emotion and intellect. My physical core was weak and my burdens were heavy. I overreacted constantly. I cried. I panicked. I became angry all the time.

As I continued through my own process of creative recovery, I learned to balance the aforementioned elements. And when I see one element drying up, I know I have the power to replenish my pool of resources. My emotions became an outlet and a gift. I now utilize them to the potential that they are worthy.